God's timing

Today is the one year anniversary of Betty's death. I keep wanting to say things like "passing", but let's face it, it was death. I had a giant poinsettia put on the Baptistry opening at Church in memory, and numerous of her friends commented on how beautiful is was and how they missed her. The Pastor spoke on the birth of John (the Baptist) and of how God acts in His own good time and not always in ways we understand. It made me think of Betty's sentence to me when I came home from Church a year ago: "Take me to the Clinic." She had not gone that day nor two or three Sunday's prior. I just thought she was having trouble with her leg and the ortho she had been wearing. The diagnosis that day was - leukemia. Room was made for her on the Cancer Ward and we made the decision to begin treatment. Little did I suspect that she had probably been developing this condition over a period of time. The 80th Birthday Celebration in early October did not portend such a problem. All of our Children were with us along with a number of grandchildren and brother John's family. Those from out of town had long since gone home. My perception of the Hospitalization changed today. What if she had died at home? We would have been pretty much alone,. As it was when she went into the Hospital the children began to come back - this time with spouses and grandchildren. A rich time of visitation went on for two weeks and when death came she was surrounded with family. God's timing was right. And there is at least some comfort in knowing that she did not die alone. The tears do not come as often as they once did, but the heart still feels its loss. TIME magazines recent article on the death of the spouse said that where there is true love over many years that grief is not as devastating. My own experience would attest to that, but I now know what Jake Otto meant when he told me time and again long after his wife had died: "I still miss her."